The Sideline Report: Hello, Philadelphia
By Pants | May 8, 2008
Category: The Sideline Report
Why Me? I have been asking myself that question since Jock asked me to come on staff. I’m not Philadelphia born, I wasn’t raised in the city and don’t claim to be an expert on the city. What I do know is that, like many young people in the area, I moved to Philadelphia at the age of 22 to start my career, and my road in Manayunk has been under construction ever since. I won’t reveal my age just yet, but will let you all know it has been over five years.
Unlike many young adults coming to the city I actually had a real world job (no not with the MTV realtiy show, which I will get into at some point) but in the Philadelphia Sports Scene. Maybe I am jumping the gun by calling college athletics the real world, but for a young adult at the age of 22 with her own office and business cards – it was the real world.
Most of the people I encountered outside of athletics were working their way through nursing school, medical school, law school or the school of life as bartenders and wait staff, which I guess leads us to my second real world job. Again not reality tv, but this time in the Philadelphia Drinking Scene.
At 22 I thought all people did in Philadelphia was watch their local sports teams, from high school through professional, and drink a lot of beer resulting in late night wings and cheesesteaks. I loved it and embraced it and in return felt that the City of Brotherly Love accepted me. Turns out, years later I still believe Philadelphians only watch sports and drink beer, but now I know the people have broadened their spectrums (ah the Spectrum) to include any event in which a tailgate is a possibility – The Bike Race, The Wing Bowl, etc…
I knew my fair share about the Sixers, Birds and Phils and considered myself a fan upon arrival in the city. I had the usual Sixers flag hanging in my living room, wore my Akers jersey on Sundays and my Michael Jack Schmidt t-shirt, inherited from my Dad, under my beer league softball jersey. But that simply wasn’t enough in this city, unless you knew the starting five and their field goal percentages, Donovan’s weekly stats, the top receivers and who was leading the team in sacks, and what this new Skipper was going to do about the pitching situation you were not a fan. So, I rectified the situation, I learned what I needed to learn both as a fan and a functioning person in the Philadelphia Society.
Coming to the city as a follower of college basketball, I found that knowing about the ’85 Wildcats and the Holy War with the Hawks, John Chaney walking the sidelines at Temple, and Penn dominating the Ivy League was not enough. I learned very fast that following college basketball in general and knowing college basketball in this city were two different worlds. Enter the Philadelphia Big 5. I would now consider myself a bit of a Big 5 connoisseur, but in the beginning needed the help of the Bob Vetrone, Jack Scheuer and Al Shrier’s of the world – don’t know who they are, then you’re not a fan!
So, Jock has asked me to be a contributing writer, so grab yourself a tall cold miller lite, a basket of wings and a cheesteak (chicken witout for me) and enjoy.
A Few Notes
I mentioned the Real World Philadelphia earlier in this piece and it made me think of how MTV has taken over the world with reality tv, to the point where Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt, stars of MTV’s reality series The Hills, walked the red carpet at the 134th running of the Kentucky Derby. These clowns happened to be friends with someone who a show is based on and, bam, they get to walk the red carpet, while I’m trying not to touch the locals in an OTB in the outskirts of Rochester. Montag wouldn’t know a horse if it bit her in the face, which is shocking considering she has a horse face.
The Derby, which Bob Costas claimed to be “the most watched two minutes of sports every year,” ended on a sad note and I am not referring to my torn up tickets. After running the race of her life, the filly Eight Belles was euthanized on the track due to breaking both front ankles. Eight Belles came in second behind Big Brown, the favorite in the race under trainer Rick Dutrow. Haven’t heard of Dutrow, well where the hell have you been? The guy has been the most outspoken trainer in the history of the world, predicting victory in every interview leading up to the race, including minutes before the race when he was basically speechless. And as if his cockiness wasn’t enough, they did back stories on the guy in every paper and tv station across the universe. Think I’m exaggerating, google the guy and you’ll see. Read about him and you’ll find out his “heroic story.” His Dad disowned him for being a low life, he moved to New York, where his baby mama was killed by cocaine dealers and then he lived in a stable for a while to get back on his feet. So, no wonder he was speechless before the race – he was high. Congrats to Big Brown though, when making your Preakness bets put Big Brown in an exacta with all – the horse can’t be beat. And pour one out for Eight Belles, she made this filly proud.
Rumor to watch this week:
Dawn Staley, after bringing the Temple women’s hoops program back from the dead, is entertaining the idea of the Head Coaching position at South Carolina. The Gamecocks will have to pay a pretty penny after Staley signed a six year extension with Temple Athletic Director Bill Bradshaw last year. Some reports have claimed Staley was earning $400,000 a year. How do you replace a superstar like Staley – WNBA and Olympic icon, Dawn Staley Foundation, um founder, and currently the Co-Chair of Philadelphia’s 2016 Olympic Bid Committee? Uh oh Bill Bradshaw, I don’t know that hiring your best buddy from down the street is going to work this time, although it was the best thing you could have done – Dunph is the man! And good luck to Staley, if she goes, because South Carolina is like the Fordham of the A-10.
And Finally
My Favorite Dancing With the Stars hotty Jason Taylor is gunning for front runner Kristy Yamaguchi after surviving elimination this week and making it to the final four. Taylor is perfect and they put him in the perfect PANTS – Have you seen Juno? I quote: “When I see them all running like that, with their THINGS bouncing around in their shorts, I always picture them naked, even if I don’t want to. I have intrusive thoughts all the time.” Jason I love you.
As you were, Pants.
Formerly, Pants was the Director of the Philadelphia Big 5, and worked in sports information for nearly a decade. She’s currently the Director of Marketing and Public Relations for Sustainable Energy Developments, based in upstate New York.
May 8th, 2008 at 6:18 pm
“and my road in Manayunk has been under construction ever since…”
sooooooo true.