WYR: Obama in Basketball / Speedpitch v. Bush
By Jock | April 28, 2008
Category: Would You Rather?
Would you rather play Barack Obama in a game of basketball, or try to beat George Bush in a game of speed-pitch? I think I’d take Obama…
Joe P., St. Joe’s Prep
Did anyone else see our old friend Dubya “deliver the high heat” the other night in the Nationals “swanky” new ballpark? Personally, I think he’s lost at least 10 mph off his heater since he took office. He used to leave the honorary catcher looking like he just caught a scud missle with his bare hand. Now he’s a goddamn junkballer. He’s throwing slop up there, trying to keep guys off balance. Someone needs to call in Dick Cheney from the bullpen. Then again, it must be hard to concentrate when the entire crowd is booing the hell out of you:
Fortunately, like Bo Jackson, Georgie is a two-sport athlete:
Theodore Roosevelt, rolling over in his grave
We like our Presidents to be sports fans, don’t we? Or better yet—athletes. Gerald Ford once said that when he faced tough times in the White House, he’dthink back to his football days at Michigan , and it’d inspire him to keep going. It’s nice to imagine that when we’re in our houses watching the WorldSeries, hanging on every pitch, the President (whoever he/she might be at the time) is down in the Oval Office, bitching about Tim McCarver, having a beer,just like us. I bet at least once the President’s been caught catching up on ESPN.com between CIA intelligence briefings. Which is kind of cool, and kind ofterrifying.
Sometimes I wonder how much we should want our Presidents to be “like us”? Don’t we want our President to be fixing things in the Middle East , or addressingother life-or-death situations, not drafting his fantasy basketball team? Well, I don’t know. There needs to be a balance. There is something undeniablyrefreshing about having a President who’s a sports fan. Sports are a HUGE part of our culture; for so many of us, they’re the organizing force of our entirelives.
(Politicians knows this, of course. Why do you think Mayor Nutter was there to throw out the first pitch? Why does Ed Rendell appear on Post Game Live? Whydoes Arlen Specter call into WIP? Why did everyone want to know who the ‘08 candidates picked in their NCAA pools? It makes them seem more grounded, more\like a human being instead of a soundbite, which I count as a good thing.)
Anyway, maybe the question isn’t: are we ready to elect a black or female president? It’s: are we ready to elect a non-sports fan president? None of the national polls will track this, but the candidate with the more sports credibility almost always wins.
Which brings us to my favorite Irishman, Mr. O’bama. We like to keep it non-partisan around here, so relax. But you have to admit it’s kind of fun to watch this clip of him:
It’ll be interesting to see how it plays out. As for the original question, I’d definitely take on the Bushman in a speed-pitch contest. Like I said,he’s a junkballer at this point in his career. No way he’s cracking 60 on the gun. Besides, you know Obama’s that wiry guy in the pickup game with the rec specs, elbowing everyone in the ribs…
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While we’re on the subject…
Phillyjock.com’s Official Top 5 Athletes in Presidential History
#5 - Dwight D. Eisenhower - Golf
Eisenhower was credited with creating the “golf boom” of the 1950s. According to sources, his military background shone through him onto the golf course, as in: “Left, left…left, right left….” Killed: 8,000,000 Germans, 25,000,000 Russians, 5,000,000 Japanese, and 67 caddies.
#4 Jessie Spano - Gymnastics
High school photo
Riding the Broad St. subway
President of the Bayside High student body, Ms. Spano was renowned for her work on the balance beam, followed by a rugburn-inducing floor program..
#3 JFK
Bobby was never afraid to go over the middle
JFK was well-known for his backyard football dominance.
#2 - Franklin D. Roosevelt - Murderball
It was hidden from the public, but Mr. Roosevelt was in fact a ruthless, psychotic wheelchair rugby player. Here’s a shot of him laughing as he stiff-arms a
defenseless seven-year-old girl.
#1 Gerald Ford - Football
Ford’s #48 was retired by the University of Michigan in 1994. A center and linebacker, Ford led the Wolverines to undefeated national championships in 1932and 1933, despite the fact that his real name was Leslie.